Never Good Enough

I watched as Gabby Douglas was ranked dead last in her final two Gymnastics events. Lately, in her interviews, she hasn't seem as bubbly as she had, leading up to and at the time of her victories at this year's Summer Olympics. I think it got to her. And by "it", I mean the media and nasty, ugly acting internet trolls and critics.

By anybody's standards, I think I was a pretty sturdy 16 year old. And yet, I was an emotional mess at times. Despite my confidence and irreverence, I, like everyone else wanted to be liked, congratulated, appreciated, and accepted. I was tough, but plenty of people hurt my feelings, even if I didn't show it. I can only imagine how some of the harsh, careless comments about Gabby have hurt her. I think what makes it worse is that so much of it has come from her own people, many of which are women much older than her, who should know better.

A girl's self esteem is nothin' to fuck with.

Not saying that anyone needs to be coddled and told that every single thing they do is amazing. But, being a complete asshole isn't necessary either.

And this is not to say that everyone in the public eye, regardless of race or gender, male isn't at some point on the receiving end of malicious, ignorant, and mean spirited remarks and critiques, but, I feel like Zora Neale Hurston was on to something. Black women do appear to be the mules of the world. It is because of the combined crushing force of racism and sexism that, often times, at least in the media, it doesn't matter what a Black woman does or how great she is. In the end, it will never be good enough.

Maybe it is because I speak from the unique perspective of a Black woman that I am sensitive to the way this chapter has played out for Gabby and plenty others. Maybe no one else sees it. Maybe I'm making it up and nothing is wrong. But I think that the public has done a little damage to her spirit. It is my hope and prayer that it is not a mortal wound, or even one that will leave a noticeable scar... But that it is easily repaired by all who love her.

The Beauty of Gabby Douglas

I'll admit, when everybody started going in on Gabby Douglas' hair, I did take a second glance at her edges. However, I quickly dismissed all of the complaints and jokes, because, let's be real... The girl is a professional athlete, competing in an even reserved for individuals at the very top of their sport... How concerned should she be about how fly her bun is at this point? If you were getting busy on the uneven bars, flying through the air at the risk of breaking your neck with one wrong maneuver, would you really care about how closely you resemble a chick on a relaxer box?

Pretty much, no. That's my answer. And I am the head chair woman of the Keep It Cute Committee. I'm a licensed cosmetologist in the state of California. I don't play games about hair. I once told a friend that he needed to reassess his relationship with a woman who came out of the house with her hair lookin' crazy on a Valentine's Day date to a basketball game at the Staple's Center. No! No! No! Nobody do that where I grew at. I'm gonna plan to like this while giving birth:

Don't play with me. But, blog isn't about hair. This is about the beauty of Gabby Douglas, despite the fact that some of us are small minded and can't see past inconsequential nonsense. I love Gabby for the following reasons:

1. 'Cause her name is Gabby and I had a best friend in elementary school with the same name.

2. Because she's Black. And to me, if that's reason enough to vote somebody into office during the presidential campaign, then surely that is enough reason to think a young girl is awesome.

3. Because she has damn near the same face and smile as my middle niece.

4. Because her last name is Douglas so I can very easily convert that to "Thuglas" which you know will come in handy at some point on Twitter.

5. It seemed no one was checking for her, but she swooped in right under the radar and became an instant icon.

6. By all accounts, she's a sweet young lady and a fierce competitor. She's humble, gracious, and credits God with all of her success.

I haven't kept up with Gymnastics in years and didn't know who Gabby was before. Now, we all know her name and she deserves all of the accolades and medals she's earned. I want to thank her for representing young black women in such a beautiful way.